What else can I write...


when i first saw him, i didnt know what he would mean to me a few months later. I thought he was a beauty of man. From the inside and outside. When my dad died a few months after i saw and heard Nirvana for the first time, they and especially Kurt became my everything. Days passed during which i could have been found sitting in my room or anywhere outside, with my walkman listening to Nirvana. I was dumb of pain these days and Kurt was my voice. I was 13 when he died and i was dumb again. When i heard of his death through the radio it felt as if time stopped running and everything was standing still. And then something bursted. And i broke down. Ive lost my closest friend of that time, when everyone else avoided me, because of my strange behaviour that found its cause in my dads death, so i think today. But nevertheless, the music stayed and even helped me through that time. I still admire him and i admire his COURAGE, yes, his courage to kill himself, because i myself never dared to do that. I dont know iif that is good or bad. Life will show it. But saying "I will kill myself" is pretty much different to really doing it. So i can say he kept being faithful to himself, he stayed on his way.

And this way ended on april 5.

--Julia K.

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